Recreational Whinge:

If there’s one statement I’m more angered / saddened by than any other it is this…”Let’s wait and see what other countries agree to do about the environment before we commit ourselves to an emissions trading scheme.  Why should we have one if countries like the USA, China and India aren’t running one?”

Oh come on!

Australia is the number two emitter of CO2 on the planet after the USA.  Don’t we have a responsibility to act now and be a role model on the planet?!

I recognise and appreciate that there are economic complexities involved.  We are smart enough to overcome these.

Waiting to see what other countries do before we act is more than just irresponsible.  It’s also downright dumb!

The Positive Spin: There have been some great articles and research papers published recently demonstrating how Australia could take the lead in energy generation for the planet, particularly using solar power.  We have a HUGE amount of space in the Outback which is mostly uninhabitable but could be effectively used to create incredibly large solar energy farms.  The energy harnessed could then be shared to the rest of the world through a series of power lines through Southeast Asia and then around the world.

Yes, this would be a massive undertaking!

But it could also mean putting an end, once and for all, to our reliance on fossil fuels!

Here is a great link if you would like to read just a bit more:

http://www.desertec-australia.org/content/australiacsppotential.html

WE CAN DO THIS! We simply need our politicians to agree and commit to it for our sake in Australia and for the planet!

WRITE TO YOUR FEDERAL REPRESENTATIVES AND ALL OF THE POLITICAL CANDIDATES IN THE ELECTION AND DEMAND THEIR ATTENTION TO THIS!

Recreational Whinge:

Well, some jerk (a 20 something adult) comes up to two kids kicking the football around, tackles one of them, takes the ball and kicks it out of the stadium, then walks back to his mates laughing about it.  Meanwhile the kids have stunned looks on their faces wondering what just happened and why.

The father of the kids witnesses what happens and walks over to the guy to discuss what’s happened, possibly either asking him to help get the ball back for his kids or at the very least to ask for an apology.  My friend couldn’t tell what the father said but it appeared he was calm and being an adult.

My friend then observed the jerk being a jerk to the kids father and laughed at him.  The jerk’s mates also laughed but you could see they were also uncomfortable about what happened and tried to get their friend (the jerk) to walk away.

This could have turned out pretty badly.  The kids’ father surely recognised the danger of the situation and decided to simply walk back to his kids and not make a bigger issue with the jerk…because the jerk wasn’t going to play nicely.  It seems apparent the jerk doesn’t know how to play nicely with kids or adults…period!

I’m sure the father then spent time with his kids discussing what happened.  It’s quite likely he had to help calm his upset kids.  He probably also had to discuss with them how some people just don’t think about the consequences of the choices they make on other people, and likely he also discussed the importance of a sincere apology when you know you’ve done something inappropriate.

Unfortunately, he might also have had to discuss with his children about knowing when to walk away from a conversation because either the other person isn’t willing to participate or worse, because continuing the conversation might be putting one at risk of harm.

So this jerk’s actions quite likely lead to a whole bunch of lessons learned by these children.  He probably didn’t realise the impact he’s had in this regard any more than he’s aware of the impact he had by kicking their ball out of the park and walking away without an apology.

What did my friend do when he saw all this?

He certainly wanted to go over and give the jerk a piece of his mind, but fortunately my friend’s companions also talked him out of it because the risk of violence was far too high and that would have sent an even more disastrous message to the kids who were experiencing all of this.

The Positive Spin: The kids have learned some lessons.  The father has learned some.  My friend and his companions learned some.  And re-telling the story to me and others has had an impact too.  All of these people have talked about what they experienced or felt about the experience told to them.  This has opened up dialogue about human behaviour, and that’s a good thing.

I also believe that it’s possible the jerk’s companions possibly had a word to him on the side and might have had a positive impact on him.  Maybe he’s learned his lessons too.

Recreational Whinge:

Does he really believe the rubbish that comes out of his mouth?  Is it possible he’s had a serious trauma to his head recently?

Yes, it’s realistic to seriously look at ways in which people might try to rort the system.  Unfortunately, it’s a fact of life in our society because quite a few people find ways of cheating systems all the time.  Sometimes they do this out of desperation.  Sometimes they’re just being plain unethical.  There’s lots we could talk about with this and I do respect that legislators need to consider certain possibilities.

But to think that women will get pregnant and then terminate simply for money?  This statement of his goes down as one of the most offensive things I’ve heard from any politician this year (and there’s been a lot…and not just from politicians)!

Senator Fielding, shame on you!

The Positive Spin: I am absolutely thrilled by the backlash he has received for this comment.  It’s great to see the public debate on this appearing in the media.  It’s getting people to think about what they say, why they say it and what harm can be caused when one doesn’t think critically.

It’s also wonderful to know that the parental leave legislation is going through, although I have mixed opinions about parts of it.  Overall I say, “It’s about bloody time.”

Recreational Whinge:

What could possbily have been going through these young guy’s minds to think that their prank which destroys really expensive equipment and historic structures is fun?  I will never accept that the alcohol made them do it if in fact that’s an excuse they might base their defense on.

How fun will it be when they get sent the bill for their stupidity?

And consider the actual costs of their stupidity beyond the money…how about the amount of time they could spend in jail?

Was it really worth it?

This is just another example of people not thinking critically about the choices they’re making.

It’s an example of how “attractive” being stupid must be to some people.  I just don’t see the appeal.

The Positive Spin: These boys “might” learn their lesson.  This experience “might” influence others to be so stupid.  But we have a long history in society of stupid behaviour and it doesn’t seem to be having much impact on some.  Maybe this means I can’t really come up with a positive spin on this one other than possibly a much nicer gazeebo will be built?

Recreational Whinge:

And I’m furious about that!

There was a fantastic programme on SBS Insight last week that I feel you need to check out.  You can read the overview and transcript of the episode or watch it online if you prefer.

Here’s the link to see the arguments presented and the fears of teaching our children ethics (without religion) that the religious representatives demonstrated to us.

I was amazed to find that they’re concerned about “competition” with their religious instruction courses.

They are fearful that children will learn to think for themselves, make their own decisions and determine their own moral code without being TOLD WHAT TO BELIEVE BY THE CHURCH, SYNAGOGUE or MOSQUE!

Isn’t about time we removed all religious influence in our government and the decisions governments make about our education?

Yes, I’m an atheist.  I just can’t understand how we can refer to the beliefs of people centuries ago in various cultures who believed in numerous gods and we call that “mythology” but once we were told somewhere along the line that there was only one god that remarkably that wasn’t mythology anymore but fact.  What?

Religion today is simply a small number of people telling the rest of us what to believe so they can control us.  It’s so easy to see how this has happened throughout the past few thousand years of our human development and yet so many people obviously want to be controlled and told what to believe in and how to act.

It just seems completely ridiculous to me that we require religious instruction in our schools when we are a secular country.  But I guess, maybe we’re not really secular after all?

My recreational whinge for today = teach ethics in schools, not religion.  Save religion for more appropriate spaces such as places of worship…or better yet, mythology class!

The Positive Spin: At least there are programmes like SBS’s Insight which are brave enough to put this issue out there to get the rest of us engaged in the conversation!  And sometimes these opportunities can create a really positive and powerful shift in societal thinking.  I have faith that our society will come to its senses.

And the more young people who attend ethics classes instead of religious instruction, the more intelligent, independent, free and successful our society will become.  I know my thoughts here are not going to be popular with many and some may think that I’m not being fair.  But I am being honest about how I feel and I’m grateful for the freedoms I have to express these thoughts and which have the opportunity to inspire others to think more critically for themselves.

Recreational Whinge:

Here’s Hank showing us how serious this affliction can be:

There’s no end to the evidence of stupidity on the planet.  Just check out the Darwin Awards or This is Just Stupid and you’ll find some hilarious stories.

Of course, these stories also make me experience some strange combination of angry and sad.

There is a difference between someone not having the relevant education or experience for the situation they’re in and someone JUST NOT THINKING!

You’ve seen my previous Recreational Whinges about people relinquishing their rights to independent thought to others because they don’t want to take responsibility for thinking for themselves.  In those cases they’re just being lazy.

But stupidity is far more likely that people don’t know HOW to think.  Maybe no one ever taught them.  Maybe they missed that day in school.

We all can have stupid moments – doing stupid things from time to time.

But there are serial idiots out there.  Worse yet, we sometimes elect them into government positions where they’re supposed to be representing the public interests.

Now, who’s being stupid?

The Positive Spin: Fortunately, many who are made aware of their moments of stupidity learn from the experience and start to further develop their critical thinking skills.

Also, I’m quite grateful that sites like the Darwin Awards or This is Just Stupid exist and are incredibly popular because in their own way, they are helping viewers/readers recognise our own moments of stupidity and/or our opportunities to be stupid in any given situation, so that we can also take advantage of the opportunities to actually think for a change and see what might happen if we put in some effort and consider the consequences of what we think, say and do.

The Recreational Whinge:

There’s a great book by David Orr called, Down to the Wire in which he states that the toxicity we find in the planet has a direct relationship to the toxicity of human relationships.

David writes, “We must transform the relationship with ourselves if we’re going to transform the relationship with nature.”  He also states, “This is a crisis of governance and leadership.”

I couldn’t agree more!

As a human being who is paying attention, and also as a professional coach who discusses such things with clients all the time, I feel there is a great need for all citizens of this planet to step up and take an active leadership role in our lives and to take responsibility for the choices we’re making which impact ourselves and others, including the environment and all of the life forms that we share it with.

I’m frustrated by the things we allow to continue without REALLY taking responsibility for them or for changing them.  Here are just a few of the situations that concern me:

• War
• Political Conflict
• Corruption
• Weapons of incredibly devastating damage
• Poverty
• Homelessness
• Repression
• Starvation
• Lack of access to medical care
• Greed
• Materialism
• Irresponsibility of corporations and governments
• Unethical behaviour
• Mental illness and depression
• Substance addiction
• Fundamentalism
• Anger
• Bad behaviour
• Bullying
• Poor role modelling
• Fraud
• Hate
• Hate crimes
• Fear of multiculturalism
• Fear of asylum seekers
• Terrorism
• Equal rights
• Withholding education from women
• The unequal treatment of women
• Acid attacks
• Censorship
• Cruelty to animals
• The disastrous state of our environments
• Lack of critical thinking skills
• Lack of considering the consequences of the choices we make
• Lack of taking responsibility for ourselves and our choices

We are only born with two fears biologically: loud noises and falling.

Every other fear is learned.  And we often learn these fears by being taught to fear them.

Fear leads to hate which means that we can also be taught to hate.

If we can be taught hate, we can also be taught fear.

If we can learn to fear, we can also learn to let go of the hate and love instead.

Why is this so hard for society to get this right?

The Positive Spin: I am a keynote speaker at a coaching conference at the end of this month and part of my message to professional coaches is this:

It is wonderful to be able to support people to set and achieve goals.  But that’s only part of what we do.

We have a great skill set that could be applied to the world’s greatest issues, and there are lots of ways we can do this with respect, permission, ethics and authenticity.

I believe it is our calling as coaches…as humans…to not only put in the intention but also put in the necessary action to have a positive impact on the lives of others and the environments we share.  Apathy in this regard is unethical.

I’d also like to highlight a wonderful organisation – The Foundation for International Leadership Coaching.  They provide access to coaching for world governments and non-governmental organisations.  Coaches donate a half day a month to support the sustainable change and positive leadership on this planet.  Check out the site to see how you can contribute.

Recreational Whinge:

Unfortunately, the product I wanted was being manufactured and sold by a company I would soon find out had no idea how to provide award-winning service!

I won’t go into all of the details here as that’s not truly important, but I will provide just a few of the lowlights:

I had to chase them up on every single item as I would still waiting to hear back on the initial proof of concept if I hadn’t.
The product I received was not exactly the product that I ordered and it was different than the proof they sent and I approved.
They omitted important information about the design specifications that I should have known up front.
There was no follow-up call or email after delivery to check if I was satisfied with the final product.

The very first time I had to make contact with them to check in and ask about the silence I was experiencing, I didn’t even get an apology.  I was willing to let that one go as everyone is entitled to one mistake as I see it, as long as they learn from it.

But they’re not off the hook for all of the other calls and emails I had to do to check in.  Completely unacceptable.

And I purposefully didn’t contact them after receiving the product to complain because I wanted to see if they would contact me for a customer satisfaction check.  That call or email I expected never came.

The Positive Spin: The award sits on my desk even though it’s not what I ordered.  I’ve kept it because it’s a reminder of a number of things.

I need to explain something here though because you’re probably wondering why I ordered a trophy for myself in the first place, right?

I ordered myself a “Lifetime Achievement” award as a physical source of inspiration for me about not only the work I do but also my attitude in life.

The award, crafted correctly or not, reminds me of my commitment to myself, my business partners and clients and my industry.

Yes, I’ve received other awards from other organisations that also mean the world to me, but my own Lifetime Achievement award is something personal that keeps me focused on what I believe I’m capabale of and the quality of my efforts that I’m committed to.  The other awards I receive are external validation that my own focus has delivered results that mean something to others.

These various awards sitting side by side make a perfect compliment to how I view my life, and the award I have given myself sits in the middle of the bunch – centre stage, if you will.

So the positive spin I take on the debacle with the trophy company is that my award reminds me of the High Ideals service I always provide, and the fact that there are flaws in the design and my experience was NOT High Ideals quality, then the award reminds me the consequences of poor service and ensures I don’t stray from the quality path I’m committed to.

Recreational Whinge:

So, which is it?  Lovely or something else?

It’s as if Australians can’t bring themselves to say what they really think about someone so they couch it in with the “lovely” comment to provide some balance.  I think it’s the Australian version of America’s “political correctness”.

Maybe they don’t want to be known as someone who just whinges about someone else, so when the gossip/comment gets forwarded on (like it’s bound to…and that may be the hidden agenda) then it’s likely to also get forwarded on with the “lovely” compliment so that when the person the comments are about finally hears them from someone else, there’s a chance that they won’t think the original comment maker wasn’t a complete prat themselves.

I suspect it’s an attempt at being fair-handed, which Australians are generally known and respected for.  It’s just not a very elegant way of doing it.  I have no doubt that people aren’t aware they’re using this language pattern and even if they are, their intentions are probably in the right place.

But come on…choose your words more consciously.  Think about what you’re really saying, how and why you’re saying it and most importantly think about the impact your words might have on others based on how they might receive them.

As Don Miguel Ruiz wrote in The Four Agreements, “be impeccable with your word.”

I have a pretty good guess at what some of you might think of me. “He’s lovely, but what a whinger!”

The Positive Spin: I mentioned above that the way Australian’s try to be fair-handed is not very elegant.  Well, they’re not known for elegance.  They’re known for calling it like they see it, for being honest and up front.  And I love that about them.  It’s one of the reasons I decided to spend the rest of my life here.

All the little cultural quirks of any group fascinate me, this one included.  In the grand scheme of things, this really is a nice-ish way of saying something.

Australians are lovely.  Period.

Recreational Whinge:

Here’s the article if you’d like to read it for yourself.  Highly recommended and check out the different views on this.

I was particularly shocked to learn that 94% of ambulance workers were assaulted on the job in the past five years!

I am also shocked that we have to keep trying to remove the weapons, when it doesn’t seem like we’re addressing the real problems here.

As one of the critics of the ban points out, might it not be more effective to increase fines by tenfold, maybe more?  Would that be a better deterrent?

Why is alcohol still being served to people who shouldn’t have more served to them?  What about the “responsible service of alcohol” legislation?

Maybe we need more security at our pubs?

Maybe we require people to go to anger management classes?

Maybe we do more in schools to address this?

Maybe more TV and media campaigns?

I don’t know the answer…but I do feel the need to have this recreational whinge because I just don’t get why we have to be so flippin’ violent as a society!

And worse yet, other people’s violent behaviour is now going to potentially negatively impact my ability to go the pub and play some pool on a weekend afternoon with my mates.  If you ban pool cues, then that’s the end of pool tables in pubs.

Yes, that’s a selfish way to end this section…but remember, sometimes a recreational whinge is all about the selfish.  Get it out so you can move on and think bigger and broader than that.

The Positive Spin: As much of a shame as such a ban would be, the very fact that so many people are talking about this issue, we might just come up with some more innovative and relevant solutions to the core problem as well as the symptoms.

And I suspect that people might just pay a bit more attention if they realise how many ambulance workers are being hurt by the people they’re trying to help.  That might just spark enough public outrage to make a real difference.